TDW #052: Everything Comes Crashing Down
- Quote: enough money
- Tweet: delete social
- Thought: fear & crashing
- Surprise: upper limits
Read Time: 4 minutes
You’ll never have enough money to buy all the stuff you don’t really need, and you’ll never have enough time to do all the things you really don’t want to do. Our Newtonian concept of both time and money is built on scarcity.
via Gay Hendricks
I have a friend who sold his business for millions and then deleted all of his social accounts the next day.
It was a breathtaking display boldness ... and I absolutely loved it.
I've been fantasizing lately about deleting all my social media accounts and going completely dark.
Rather than delete them all, I think what I really want is the option to use them (or not use them) as I please.
Ever been there?
Everything Comes Crashing Down
I used to be afraid everything I built would come crashing to the ground at any moment.
Ever been there?
The other shoe will drop.
The rooster comes home to roost.
A knock on the door.
An unexpected call on the phone.
It’s a moment where your soul hiccups.
You become convinced disaster is waiting to pounce.
It’s the same feeling I had when all three of our kids were first born. Waking up in cold sweats. Convinced they were just going to stop breathing.
You sit in bed, telling yourself you’re being ridiculous. “Babies don’t just stop breathing,” you say.
But the fear edges and nibbles away at your logic. You give in and rush into their rooms and stick your hand underneath their nose to feel their warm, tiny breath. You put your hand on their chest to feel the rise and fall. Pick up a tiny heartbeat.
Then you go back to your room and assure your spouse (who’s wondering the same thing you are) that your jiggly bag of baby is still alive.
I talked with a friend recently who has his own growing business. He’s smart. Capable. Can pretty much do anything that’s handed to him. He’ll win no matter what in life.
But he has the same fear: One day, it’s all just going to…go away.
My wife reminds me that in the near 10 years we’ve been in business, I’ve never once been unable to find a way forward.
But the same nagging feeling still shows up from time to time.
Waiting. Lurking. Humming with energy. Ready to bite. Wanting to pounce at any given moment.
I’ve probably spent more time with CEOs, business owners, and entrepreneurs in the last 6 months than I have in my whole entire life.
Lunches. Coffees. Books. Podcasts.
Just learning, absorbing.
Soaking everything in that I possibly can.
They are my antidote to the fear poison. They’ve battled the same beasts I have (or will) and know there’s nothing to fear. Truly.
I like to picture the worst that can happen when I feel fear getting the best of me. Like…what IF everything just vanished? Collapsed? What would happen?
We’d always have a place to live. Family and friends would make sure of that.
My wife has stated, on numerous occasions, “if you ever leave, I’m going with you.”
My kids? Well, they just want to know when the next wrestling match or game of Battleship is happening.
And money replenishes. Money isn’t the hard part. There’s about a billion ways to make money on this planet. I’ve discovered maybe 3 of them. 4 if I’m lucky.
But let’s not assume there aren’t consequences.
Fear is what keeps us strapped to our desks—letting bosses lure things like 401ks, casual Fridays, and 2 weeks vacation over our heads.
Fear has kept me from making big decisions I knew were right. I was crippled by “what-ifs?” and the opportunity faded away.
Like, one time I had the opportunity to buy a business that was insanely profitable. The numbers were bigger than anything I had ever seen before in my life. Bigger profits, yes. But MUCH bigger price tag than I was used to.
So I passed. And someone else bought it. And now they’re making that money and I’m not. I can excuse it away all day…
- “It was bad timing…”
- “I need more information before I make the decision…”
- “I’ll touch base with you in a week…”
Whatever. Those may all be true, but the main reason wasn’t lack of information or timing or communication. I was afraid. So I didn’t do anything.
Fear can be a pretty strong force that holds us back from taking risks and seizing opportunities. It's totally understandable to have moments of doubt and worry, but it's important to remember that we often underestimate our own strength and ability to overcome challenges.
Sometimes, the worst-case scenario isn't as bad as we think, and even if things don't go as planned, we can figure out a way to move forward.
It's crucial to face our fears head-on and not let them control our choices.
This week's quote is from the book The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks.
I read it back in 2017 but recently re-read it after my therapist and I discovered a stubborn set of limiting beliefs.
The Big Leap is all about finding your "upper-limit problems" — self-induced habits and hold-ups that keep us from breaking through the success ceilings our subconscious sets for us.
I won't spoil it, but the book centers around one central question:
How much abundance and success am I willing to accept?
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